Last week, I went with the family to a hot air balloon festival. For the sake of staying positive, I’ll leave out the part about how it took us 45 minutes to drive the first 50 miles and 45 more minutes to drive the last half mile. And the part about how a 20 ounce soda was spilled in the backseat of my car.

We ended up having a pretty good time.  And I learned a few things:

- Hot air balloons are bigger than I thought
- Barn-shaped hot air balloons take longer to inflate
- I kind of want a flamethrower
- I would only go in one of these things if I was given $100 million American dollars, or if I was knocked unconscious

Enjoy the photos.

The girl: Nippo.

Me: What?

The girl: Nippo!

Me: Hippo?

The girl: Nippo (points to a scar on my forearm)

Then I realized – she was calling my scar a nipple. Thanks to her brother for making sure that’s on her first 100 words list.

Ohai! Remember me? Here’s a list of some stuff I’ve been doing over my spring break:

Using Twitter instead of blogging – I still won’t call myself a Twitter lover, but I have definitely learned to embrace it. And for those who do follow me on Twitter, you probably already know everything I’m going to mention on this list. But you should probably keep reading anyway, for my ego’s sake.

Working – You’d think summer would be a slow time when working at a university, wouldn’t you? I know I would. And in fact, I expect that every summer, even though 5 of the 7 summers I’ve worked there have been pretty crazy. (Isn’t there some saying about that, how the definition of crazy is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results? Yeah.)

Playing guitar – I haven’t really learned a ton more songs (much to the chagrin of those who live with me and hear me practice), but I’ve been trying hard to work on things like keeping a steady rhythm and making sure notes ring out properly. The good news is that I still really enjoy it. The bad news is that I still pretty much suck.

Playing tennis – For Christmas, my wife signed me up for a tennis class (yes, Christmas. We intentionally deferred until now, because what good is it for me to learn tennis in the winter?). My class finished up last week, and I’ve gotta say, it was more fun than I thought it would be. The teacher was great. The best part was that the class was held at a private club. This particular class is the only one that non-members can sign up for (I am not a member). So after every class, they were pushing free food and drinks on us, in an effort to show us how much better our lives would be with them in it. I’m still not joining, but their recruitment efforts sure were tasty!

Losing weight – I joined a “Weight Watchers at work” program back in April. For years, I’ve had a weight system where I gain in the fall and winter, then lose in the spring and summer. I didn’t love it, but it worked for me. That is, until the past two years, when I kept up the gaining in fall and winter, but didn’t do so much losing in the spring and summer. So by March, I was at an all-time high weight. Since joining WW, I’ve dropped 22 pounds. And there’s still a month and a half left, so I hope I’m not done yet! Of course, the real test of how well the program works will not come until weeks after the Weight Watchers sessions are done, but I can’t say enough good things about it now. I’m at my lowest weight since 2003. I haven’t significantly increased my level of activity, I’ve just learned how to not eat like a pig. Funny how that works.

Boy: Why does a boat float?
Me: Ask me tomorrow (makes a note to do some research)

The next morning…
Boy: Why does a boat float?
Me: A boat, or any object, floats because it’s lighter than the weight of the water it displaces.

Boy: But some boats are heavy.
Me: Yes, but if they’re boats that float, they’re not as heavy as the water they displace.

Boy: What’s “displace” mean?
Me: Um, it sort of means to move something out of the way. If you have a cup of water that’s filled all the way to the top, and you put a rock in the cup, some of the water will spill out of the cup. That water that spills out is the water that was displaced by the rock. And because the rock doesn’t float, that means that the rock is heavier than the water that spilled out. I’ll show you next time you’re in the tub.

Boy: Where does water from the ocean go when it spills out?
Me: … Let’s watch TV.

3 – Length, in days, of my daughter’s birthday.

57 – Number of remaining square feet of floor space in my house after her parties.

1 – Number of new guitars I got for my birthday from my awesome in-laws.

1000 – Approximate number of hours I’ve spent playing it. You’d think I’d be good by now.

2 – Days we participated in my neighborhood’s annual garage sale.

4 – Moist dollars I received from out of a gross lady’s bra. [shudder]

43 – Dollars of change requested by the lady who only had a $50 bill on her.

1,000,000 – Grossly exaggerated number of dollars received for our junk at the garage sale. I thought about getting all Scrooge McDuck and swimming around in the sea of dollar bills, but then I remembered the bra lady. [re-shudder]